Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World Week 1

Welcome back to online bible study and our first discussion of the book Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World by Joanna Weaver. We’ve just finished reading chapters one and two in the book. In the first chapter Joanna compared the two sisters from the gospel of Luke – Martha and Mary- and revealed the conflict we experience as women. These women represent a common struggle: we want to worship like Mary and we’re often tied to our duties like Martha. Mary’s world symbolizes living room intimacy and worship, while Martha’s world represents kitchen service and perfection.

In this story “two completely different women undergo a transformation right before our eyes; a holy makeover. The bold one becomes meek, the mild one courageous. For it is impossible to be in the presence of Jesus and not be changed,” writes Joanna Weaver. When Jesus invites us to leave the kitchen and join Him in the living room, the focus is no longer on ourselves and our duties. The focus is now on Him.

Joanna says “Martha opened her home to Jesus, but that doesn’t automatically mean she opened her heart.”  In our second chapter we see inside Martha’s heart as she complains to Jesus. It appears to Martha that she’s doing all the work, while Mary is getting all the attention and praise. Martha wants Jesus to notice her for serving Him, yet Jesus already knows her heart.  Joanna shows us how the enemy uses distractions, discouragement and doubt to keep us distant from Jesus and out of the living room. Martha was distracted by preparing her home, discouraged when Mary did not assist her, and doubted her Savior when she had the opportunity to worship at his feet. Martha’s busyness became the devil’s tool.

Martha’s need to be perfect overshadowed her opportunity for intimacy with Jesus. She took her eyes off the Savior and put them on herself, meeting her need to be praised for her perfection. As we’ll learn next week, she’s a big worrier and lacks peace. It’s not easy to sit in the living room and listen to Jesus, when your mind spins a mile a minute and lacks peace!

Prayer Requests

Please visit our Prayer Wall and post a prayer request or praise report. Take time this week to lift others up with your prayers.

Joanna Weaver Quotes

  • We want to worship like Mary, but the Martha inside keeps bossing us around.
  • Mary chose to let someone do the serving so she could do the listening.
  • It’s impossible to be in the presence of Jesus and not be changed.
  • Busyness, by itself, breeds distraction.
  • While the world applauds achievement, God desires companionship.
  • Doubt, left unchecked, can fester into unbelief.

For Next Week

Group Discussion- Answer one question or as many as you like

  1. Which woman do you relate to most, Martha or Mary? Why?
  2. Finish this sentence: If I were a perfect woman, I would ……
  3. Have you seen a “holy makeover” in your own life or the life of someone you know? What happened?
  4. Share a favorite moment from this week’s study.

Author Christine Abraham

Founder and Ministry Director of the Womens Bible Cafe™ since 2009, Christine has led 60+ online Bible Studies for women. She completed a Graduate of Biblical Studies from Liberty University. She's an inspired writer, Amazon Top Reviewer and Blogger Follow on Facebook

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Join the discussion 108 Comments

  • Audrey R. says:

    I really want to be a Mary as I wold loveto listen and learn to hear from the Master. I believe we are all a combination of the 2. I strive to do well, to make friends, to have people like me, to keep my home nice and clean, to organize my life. But after all these “wprks”, I get so tired and just wan to sit and lean and listen to Jesus. To know that He is always there and ready to take my hand and let me sit at his feet and sigh and just know that He is with me. I once had a dream and I was walking on the beach talking with Jesus. I said itis so great just being with you hanging out and Jesus turned to me with a smile and said “Don´tt you know you can hang out with me anytime”. For me that was a huge changing moment in my life. I have never forgot that dream so I try to hang out with the lover of my soul every opportunity that I can..

  • Janey says:

    I am happy to say that I am now more of a Mary than a Martha. It has taken me many years to learn to crave to listen to our Lord more than doing anything else. I loved the three Ds they have really made me aware of how easy it is to allow everyday life to distract me, discourage me and then cause me to doubt.

  • Lauri says:

    When I stayed home with my kids when they were younger I was definitely a Martha! Breakfast for them and my husband every day, spotless house and supper every night. Not to mention laundry and appts and room parenting and PTO. Thank goodness they are grown up! 🙂
    I recently quit my job due to stress/anxiety and nonrelated issues. I now find myself more willing to be a Mary and let Jesus teach me and to learn from Him. I do have days when I forget to pencil him in, put I think that is Satan working so as soon as I realize I’ve not been in the word at all, I get on it even if it’s just my daily verse on my phone or open my Bible randomly. This is a great study!

  • Trina says:

    I relate mostly to Martha…. I find it very hard to just let things slide when guests are over because if a group of more then 5 are around me I get anxious and I can be resentful if I am the one working hard to plan and put together a gathering and not have the help I think I need or the recognition. I don’t get parties or large groups it’s just not fun to me and I’m to shy to just go sit at the Lord’s feet I’d be in the background/kitchen listening from there.
    If I were a perfect women I would be completely healthy and better at being social.

  • Desiree says:

    1. Which woman do you relate to most, Martha or Mary? Why?
    I believe I relate to Martha more now. When I was younger, I was definitely a Mary. Inquisitive, more likely to veer off to smell the flowers than to pick them and make an arrangement. I think life has just trained me to be a Martha. Either learn to cook or have your family eat canned beans and instant rice every evening. Either settle down with a job, or we won’t be able to pay rent, etc. It’s the sink or swim kind of situation that said, okay you can either wonder and write and listen…but be “unsuccessful,” or step into reality with everyone else. Somewhere along the way I got so caught up in the doing that I lost the listening.
    2. Finish this sentence: If I were a perfect woman, I would be able to keep my child from struggling in school. Pfft, I would have enough time to help her! I would cook a completely balanced and healthy meal each night. I could keep my house clean. I would make time for health, physical, mental, and spiritual. I would be able to support my husband when he is tired. I would be able to understand and cure my daughters resentments.
    3. Have you seen a “holy makeover” in your own life or the life of someone you know? What happened?
    I’m not sure if I could call it a holy makeover. When I think of makeover I see the before and after pictures and go, oh yea, that’s way different….I guess there has been a holy makeover in my life, if you call going from a resentful, rebellious non-believer, to a woman who knows God loves her, and knows that Jesus died for our sins and we are forgiven, but I guess I don’t feel as close as I could be or should be. Which is why I wanted to join a bible study. To know and understand more. To have some meat behind the belief.

  • Teresa says:

    Sorry for coming in late…finally got my book and am caught up! This week’s reading opened my eyes to the Three Deadly Ds of Destruction – Distraction, Discouragement and Doubt. If my heart is bogged down with worry or duty (distractions) I’m surely misfocused. Being preoccupied draws me away from our Lord. My distraction leads to discouragement and doubt. I’m usually plowing full steam ahead through life and need to remind myself to rest, be patient, allow myself to wallow in self-pity for just a bit then pick myself up and surrender the problem to God…He’s already got it figured out 🙂

  • Marie says:

    Wow…such wonderful comments and insights so far! love this!

    Which woman do you relate to most, Martha or Mary? Why? – I’m a mixture. Have been for most of my life. Being the oldest and the planner… I understand the frustrations of not having enough help, wanting things to be just right and wondering who cares. My love of the bazillions of blessings in my life, want to keep me at the feet of Jesus – so I fill my day with song, audio on Biblical topics and learn & worship as often as possible.

    Finish this sentence: If I were a perfect woman, I would …… – never ever worry

    Have you seen a “holy makeover” in your own life or the life of someone you know? What happened? I have. 2 yrs ago, even though I was always praying, always worshiping – doing devotions, studies as well as serving the Lord happily – through the grief of missing my dad, I realized that I was very far away from the Lord. I sobbed while looking at a picture of me & my dad wondering why i was still missing him so many years later…and realized that i truly adored my father. and then the Lord spoke to my heart….do you adore me that way? i knew that i hadn’t in a long time. completely convicted – i made new efforts to do so and God started bringing people my way to help with that.

    Share a favorite moment from this week’s study:

    I love this quote – “Three deadly D’s of Destruction – Distraction, Discouragement and Doubt” because this completely sums up how many people struggle through their days. Many of us, including myself have so many negative distractions that bring about the discouragement and doubt so we just “stop” when we need to run to the feet of Jesus….sit, focus and be reminded “is there anything too hard for the LORD”

    i’m going to go and sit now…

    {hugs] wrapped with prayer for an awesome week of work and worship for us all

  • Pam Shepard says:

    I am going to make a comment that some may find offensive, please forgive me.
    I feel today I am more like Martha, pushing, don’t stop until it’s finished. I work five days a week, live forty-five min, from the job, wife, mom, ect…….
    I believe Mary was the woman at the well, she was “woman of the night”, Jesus was her way out. At first I think she believe she had a chance with Him, but then realized Who He was and wanted to learn from Him.
    I think all women are like both at different times in their lives.

    • Christine says:

      In Roman Catholic tradition, Mary of Bethany is identified as Mary Magdalene, while in Eastern Orthodox and Protestant traditions they are considered separate persons. (source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_of_Bethany )

      There is no scripture to show Mary of Bethany is the woman at the well. The woman at the well was a Samaratian. Jesus was in Samaria (John 4:4 NIV) when he met the woman at the well. (John 4:7 NIV)

      Now a man named Lazarus was sick. He was from Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. John 11:1 NIV shows the two sisters are from Bethany, not Samaria.

      Author Dan Brown was able to convince many people of false teaching in his book/movie The DaVinci Code. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inaccuracies_in_The_Da_Vinci_Code

      Remember Satan knows scripture very well, and he twists it to look like the truth. When in doubt, look to the scriptures to prove or disprove your theory.

  • Patty says:

    I am more of a Martha, I feel like there is always something to do and want it to be done perfectly. And too often I get irritated by my husband and children for not pitching in more around the house. I want to be more like Mary and want to spend more time and energy knowing God. The part of the book that spoke to me was where Joanna mentioned that Mary’s gift was availability, I definitely need to make myself more available to God and sit at his feet.

  • Sheree says:

    I have really enjoyed reading this book, and I didn’t even sign up to do this book study, but I have felt led to read it and now I know why. I used to be a Martha….a perfectionalist in everything I did, which just about caused me to have a nervous breakdown several years ago. Therefore, I would say that God changed me and I began to see Jesus through Mary’s eyes. But something happened recently, and it’s no wonder why God wants me to read this book. The “Three Deadly Ds of Destruction” really spoke to me this week…”distraction, discouragement, and doubt” have crept into my life and I can even add a fourth “despair.” Someone I love and care about very much hurt me terribly this past weekend, which threw me for a loop. I have found myself falling into a pit of despair and anxiety, when it’s plain to see that this is an attack of Satan to try and knock me off balance. I’m also studying “When Godly People do Ungodly Things” so I see very clearly what’s happening here. My time with Jesus, at His feet, is so very sweet, and I know what He can do and I’m trusting Him in this situation. This Mary/Martha study really compliments the Beth Moore study, and is helping me immensely. I still hurt, but I know my Savior can heal ANY situation. I don’t know why I have a hard time asking for prayers for myself, but I would appreciate my Bible study online friends to pray for me to speak with wisdom throughout this situation.

    • Christine says:

      You are wise to recognize that Satan is using the relationship to knock you down. Pray through it, especially when you feel angry. Do the opposite of what Satan expects. He wants you to bury anger in your heart and take your eyes off God. Instead, put your heart and mind on God and PRAISE HIM as the battle lingers on. When you praise God in the middle of your firestorm, the enemy has no fuel to his game.

  • JEIPEL says:

    I can most realate to Martha always trying to be superwoman and then resenting everyone who doesn’t help me achieve that goal. If I was a perfect woman I would spend alone time with God @ 4:30 A.M.before my busyness started my house would be clean always I would have gourmet meals on the table @ 6:OOP.M. and be a perfect wife and mother…(unrealistic you think?)
    What touched me most this week was in the book when Joanne said we should use our worries as an oppurtunity to pray. I really felt like somethig went off in my brain and I was like I can do that….

  • Julie says:

    I relate more to Martha. When I have guests in my home, I focus more on making sure their needs are met. In everyday life, I feel like I am constantly trying to get things done, and intimacy with Jesus has been on the back burner. That’s why I’m so thankful to have Sue Alice in my life. She keeps me coming back to this Bible study so I can be in God’s word more and work on my intimacy with Him. God keeps putting people like her in my life to keep me focused on Him, and I’m very thankful for that. Now I’m trying to be more like Mary by making time every day to be in God’s word and work on my Bible study.

    • Christine says:

      Nice to meet another member of Sue Alice’s “family” I would like to meet her in person someday. 🙂

      • Sue Alice says:


        Thanks for the kind and wonderful words. I can be pushy in my old age. Keep up the good word. Remember I am always here. Blessing to you and yours. I love you. HUGS.

      • Sue Alice says:


        Please be careful for what you wish for!!!! I hope to meet you also someday. I love you. Blessing to you and yours. HUG.

  • Paige says:

    Hello my Sisters in Christ;
    I have loved reading your posts. Thank you for sharing!!
    I am a Mary, always have been. My older sister is Martha. And like Joanna says, Jesus didn’t try to make Mary Martha or Matha Mary. My sister and I have 2 different life styles and different ways of loving our Lord & Savior. GOD is so good! But my sister still tries to make me into a Martha. That ain’t gonna happen!!!
    God performed a holy make over in my life 12-18-03 when I accepted Jesus and He moved me out of an abusive relationship to a loving relationship with Him.
    I loved both chapters but the 3 Ds really spoke loudest to me.
    Can’t wait to continue my reading. Have a great week everyone!!

  • lorrie says:

    1. I see myself in both of them Mary because I am prone to my emotions and am sensitive like Mary yet i like to be structred and strive for perfection like Martha
    2. I would be happy with my life everything would make sense
    3. I’m not sure its a holy makeover but I’ve sen a change n my best friend before she married him she was driven structured scheduled and no nonsense type ( much like martha) and after she married she was calm joyful and enjoying her life she now has been maried 5 years with 2 kids and is happy .
    4.i liked how she brought martha and mary to life to make them more like us and help us to see them as women that wecan relate to not just people from the past

  • Jennifer says:

    1.Which woman do you relate to most, Martha or Mary? Why?

    I really think I’m more of a Mary by nature, but find myself living a Martha life just because of how crazy busy life gets with a full time job and two kids. We don’t even have much extra curricular activities, but just trying to run a household and keep all the various schedules in line brings out my inner Martha and suppresses my typical Mary self. I really want to find balance between the two because I feel that I can’t be both and I have to chose one or the other…

    2.Finish this sentence: If I were a perfect woman, I would ……

    Have enough time to get everything done, spend time with each child and my husband, giving each full undivided attention, my house would be in order, bills would never be late due to my forgetfulness; I would have time to spend with God each day….

  • Sue Alice says:

    1. I am a Martha and my sister is a Mary. I am always going about finding sometime to do, clean, cook, or fix. I tend to be about other things more than the Lord’s, but I am going to change that and learn to put the Lord first. No, I will never be a Mary all the way, but that I will leave up to my sister, so she can teach me along the way. Make me strong in His sight.

    2. If I was a perfert woman……..it would all be done and I would have more time for the Lord.

    3. Holy makeover……..more in my sisters life than mine, she had a big change in her life ten years ago and God helped her through it…..without the Lord’s help, I think she just would have given up. I on the other hand tend to go with the flow…….do not get me wrong the Lord has done BIG things in my life, and I am thankful for them. God is so good.

  • Carolyn says:

    Which woman do you relate to most, Martha or Mary? Why?
    I have a little bit of both women inside of me. Like Martha, I have a nasty habit of bussiness around the house which results in me working myself up over one thing or another. But Like Mary, I can also lose myself in certain tasks or relationships while ignoring more critical areas of my life.

    Finish this sentence: If I were a perfect woman, I would ……
    have balance and peace!

    Have you seen a “holy makeover” in your own life or the life of someone you know? What happened?
    The Lord is working on me, but I’m not yet a finished product! Now, I hear Him speak to me when the bussiness behavior starts. He reminds to be slow and methodical like His son was on earth. I’m working on the listening part.

    Share a favorite moment from this week’s study.

  • Melissa says:

    I too was profoundly convicted by the 3 D’s in this study! I find it so easy to fall into discouragement. My list of to do’s is like a reader board in my brain… one thing after another after another. I can never seen to keep up or do anything to the caliber I desire. I was struck by the quote “busyness by itself breeds distraction.” This is so my life right now! I yearn to bring my focus back to my God, long for Him to be my first priority ALWAYS and allow every decision and action to come through Him. The inset entitled “Five Strategies for Fighting Discouragement” has been amazing for me! Each point made spoke right to me and I feel empowered by these tools. May I learn to use them for God’s glory! In closing I ask for prayer on this topic of discouragement in my life. I feel Satan using this to attack my life right now and I know that he does this to derail me from this awesome study. I stand against it!

  • Ginny Haynie says:

    1. I relate more to Martha. I seem to always be busy doing something and find that I don’t have as much patience with anyone who is either not helping or making things more difficult. I know that I need to take a breath and slow down the pace and take the time to rest in God and spend more times on things that matter (ie. quiet times, playing with the kids, etc.) instead of worrying endlessly about the stream of things that are not of lasting importance but fill my time
    2. If I were a perfect woman, I would always be smiling, be patient, be available to play with my kids at a moments notice, have a house that looks like Martha Stewart lived there and have a well cooked dinner on the table. And not one of those things would actually make me perfect. While I typed that out I was thinking how that would only make me appear perfect on the outside, to a casual observer. But would tell nothing of the condition of my heart and mind which are where I think more time should be spent.
    4. There were so many moments in these two chapters where I felt like the writer was talking to me. It’s like she knows me. I am anxious and excited about reading the rest of the book and praying that as i continue that I keep responding to conviction and work to get myself back in line.

  • Debbie says:

    I am a “Martha,” too. But, I feel like the Spirit is working on me! I finally realize that my lists will never be finished and I will never be able to say “Ok, I’ve done everything that needs doing. Now I can stop and enjoy the reward.” I am learning to claim the reward (my time with God in nature or scripture or joy-filled activity) regularly. Those chores on my list will still be there after the moments I spend in devotion and I will be refreshed for the tasks ahead. If I don’t choose to claim the moment, I will most definitely lose it – and miss all the glorious opportunities God reveals in those sweet moments! No one wants to have regrets…I have already lost some of those precious times…trying not to miss anymore!

  • Dawn says:

    This weeks study has touched me so deeply. I have opend up to the Lord to change my heart as He shows me that as I I try to be Martha I become exhausted, overwhelmed and even resentful. I behave in ways that definitely do not honour my God, (some serious work needed on this Marthas attitudes). My favourite moment this week has been finally understanding that, while its Ok to go to Him when we are discouraged and overwhelmed , spending time at his feet is not something to fit into my day when, or if, I get a moment – I Need Him every moment of every day, there isnt, or every could be, anything on my to do list thats more important than time with my Lord..

    • Judy Carter says:

      I agree; I need to remember just fitting in the time to spend at His feet when I get a moment is not enough… Remembering He is with me through out my day and I can visit and share things with Him seeking His guidence and keeping Him at the top of my to do list.
      As you said; nothing on my list could be as important as time with my Lord,…not just once a day but all day…..
      Thanks for sharing…

  • Elsa says:

    I too, relate to Martha, the busyness and need for perfection takes away my focus on what is really important -Jesus.
    If I were a perfect woman, would I really need Jesus?
    I have not seen a “holy makeover” but I am praying I become one 🙂

  • Amy says:

    I relate more to Martha because I find myself “busy” with so many things but in the end those things I was busy doing wasn’t really the important things. I tend to want to be a pleaser and I need to be more of a follower. I find myself laying in bed at night with so many things buzzing around in my head of things that have to get done. This just makes me more tired and able to find excuses out of getting out of quiet time with the Lord. I want to find that peace that if it gets done ok but if it doesn’t and I have more time in prayer with my Lord then that is what my goal should be.

    If I were a perfect women I would calm down, take a deep breath and love the world that my God created for ME. I would take things in stride and pursue a relationship more with Him. Even in doing this I wouldn’t be perfect but at least I would have my priorities where they need to be.

  • Monica says:

    My favorite moment from this week’s study was realizing how much I was going to get from this book. It was really speaking to me and I was already learning so much just within the first two chapters! I’m excited to see what else is in store further in the study! I also loved having Matthew 11:28-30 brought to my attention. Such a great verse to have when your in Martha mode! 🙂

  • Donna says:

    Oh …I’m a Martha for sure…letting distractions keep me from spending time with Him and from being in the Word. I do feel with all my heart that this study will be a turn around for me. I have such joy and peace when I do take the time to seek, discover and learn from Him. Change isn’t easy for me…it never has been…but with His guidance and love I know with all my heart that it can and certainly will happen.
    Blessing to you all!

  • Jace says:

    Oh…so many revelations through these chapters…so many wonderful God moments! I think my favorite part of this portion was the Asking Questions section of Chapter 2. I love that God isn’t offended by our asking. Even when we stomp the proverbial foot and act less than the image He created us in, He loves us enough to take our questions, to take our doubt and discouragement and to gently, quietly tell us what we need to hear. I love that God so desires companionship. He invites us to sit with Him…in the secret and the quiet. He calls us to the deep…to the still…for there, apart from our running, our exhaustion, our frustration…there, He rejuvenates our desperate hearts. There, He nurses our wounds and heals our hurts, and as a mother so often does to her toddling child, He gently picks us up, faces us in the right direction, and watches as we set off to meet more opportunities to return to Him.

    • Angie says:

      Beautifully said, Jace!

    • Miranda says:

      I felt the same way Jace. Your words are gentle on the heart. They are so correct. Loving GOD is wonderful because His demands are few. “Come, all you who are heavy laden and I will give you rest.” I am Thankful to be His precious daughter. He cares for all that we care about. The best thing, the first thing I must do is to take the time to be with Him. He has wonderful things to tell me. There isn’t anything I can do perfectly on my own apart from Him (though I try). I’m grateful that He wants to help me, instruct me, guide me, and provide all of my needs in Christ Jesus.

  • Judy Carter says:

    I definitely relate to Martha. I noted at the beginning of the study I describe myself as distracted; Satan uses daily living such as; working ,then trying to take care of duties once I’m home and fit in time with family members. By the time I get to sit down in the evening and thinking I will spend time with God in prayer and study I find myself exhausted and it’s time to go to bed and then start all over again the next day. I find I feel guilty if things are not done to take care of my family but I also feel guilty for not finding time to spend with God in quite time alone. Satan seems to use a double edged sword; distraction and guilt both ways.
    I feel my heart is more like Mary and long to sit at my Lords feet but the Martha part of me seems to always win out.
    If I were a perfect woman; I would start each day asking God to set my schedule and show me my priorities so as to not miss any of blessing that were meant for me as well as my family; which I am currently letting Satan keep me distracted and can’t help but feel I am missing part ofwhat the Lord has planned for me.
    I too was convicted by the 3 d’s. I look forward to all that the Lord has to show me in getting my priorities straight and learn how to balance the Martha and Mary in me.

  • Keri says:

    In the past I have been more of a Martha – always working and doing. In the past nine months, I have seen a “holy makeover” begin, and cannot wait to see where Jesus leads! In the process of this holy makeover, I have enjoyed learning to sit at Jesus’ feet like Mary – to the point of actually limiting the involvement in activities and standing up for myself and saying NO at times. It is a wonderful experience!

  • Louella says:

    I relate to Martha. I always am trying to do things for people. I would like to sit back and just listen to Jesus, but feel that I have to be busy or else people would think I am lazy.Sometimes when I have company, I will spend time cleaning even while they are here.

    • Angie says:

      I get what you are saying about cleaning when you have company Louella! I can’t tell you how many times when we have family gatherings at our house I have heard the question “Where is my fork/napkin/cup that I just laid/sat down?” – Because I, in my obsesssive need to have everything clean and in it’s place, have picked it up the minute they laid it down and walked away from it and put it in the trash or dishwasher! My poor family has learned to hold on to everything with a tight grip if they see me in the vicinity. It is very difficult for me to sit down, relax and just visit when there are things to be done!

  • Susan says:

    I’m definitely a Martha. I create lists of things that need to be done and become frustrated, discouraged and angry when events don’t fall into place like I think they should and want them to. I am getting a LOT better at this though by changing my priorities. Even though Mary was bold in her actions I think she was more receptive to Jesus where Martha was caught up in doing what she thought was right.
    If I were a perfect woman, I would be the woman God wants me to be.
    I have seen a “holy makeover” in someone’s life I know. 30 years ago he attended a revival and answered the invitation to be healed. He has not had an alcoholic drink or smoked cigarettes since that day. His entire life changed that day and I’m talking a 360. God has remained the focus of his life.
    The 3 D’s jumped off the page at me. The fact that focusing on my circumstances instead of God was a BIG eye opener.

  • Rhonda B. says:

    1.Which woman do you relate to most, Martha or Mary? Why? I am definitely a Martha, but I long to be a Mary. It is just so easy to fall prey to the “Everybody wants a little piece of my time” mentality, and feel guilty if we can’t keep up. A few months ago, I found myself flat of my back with an illness. I finally realized that life WILL go on, even if I am not doing everything I think is required. Like someone else posted earlier, I have been of the mindset that if I don’t do everything asked of me, noone else will do it. I think that this Bible Study will help me change that way of thinking. I can say “No” to things I just don’t have time for, without feeling guilty or burdened down about it.
    2.Finish this sentence: If I were a perfect woman, I would ….. know how to balance the necessary things with the trivial things, in order to honor God with my time.

  • Charlotte says:

    I relate to Martha. More so now that school has started. The daily demands of lesson planning seem to consume most of my time. I struggle with making time for the living room intimacy.

  • Tammy says:

    I am definitely a Martha! I have (or think I have) to have a certain routine, and when something interferes with it, I get frustrated, try to deal with what needs to be done getting kids off to school, making sure morning chores are done, getting to work, planning my day, get interupted over and over again, go back to what I was originally doing and then the interuptions again. These interuptions I am speaking of are part of my job and mostly are legitimate. I am the kind of person that tries to “fix” everything for anyone who asked, and some that don’t. I try to leave work on time so i can pick up my 11 year old from after school care and then home to cook dinner, make sure homework is completed, baths are taken, animals are cared for, get the 16 year old to help cook, clean the kitchen, by the time the day is over my poor husband gets my “leftovers” and sometimes they are not so good. I wanted to start this Bible study to try and get my self where I need to be, as God want’s me to be.
    As far as being the perfect anything, I would love to be able to love my husband as jesus loves us, be the perfect parent by spending more quality time and less need to to things time. I am just hoping to find a balance between Martha and Mary.

  • Sandy says:

    1. I relate more to Martha because I am a bit of a control freak. I like things done my way and don’t like to let someone else do it their way. I am being dealt with by God on this character trait (among other things). I would love to be able to drop everything and just worship every morning and not let anything interrupt that.

  • shannon says:

    1. I am more like Martha. I let the busyness of life in general overtake and consume all of me! I have been distracted and kind of seperated myself from my saviour….if you know what I mean. I have let satan distract me with all of the things going on in and around my life, and it’s very frustrating. I am so upset with myself that I have let myself be sooo busy and but Jesus on the back burner. I would love to be the Mary, where I just fall at his feet and be in his presence…..which is my number one reason for participating in this study….to get back to that place.

  • Jennifer Martin says:

    I think I can relate more to Martha. I feel the need to cook, clean and run around like crazy to make sure the house is the way it needs to be…constantly. But, many times this is so unrealistic. Although, I do not work right now, I am going to school to finish a masters degree and a nursing degree. I know I need to just sit down.
    If I were a perfect woman, I would….always be right.

  • Jenise says:

    I am so much a “Martha!” My mom (also a Martha) recommended this study because of how much it has taught her as well. Chapter 2 held so many truths for me…needing approval through good works, needing praise for a job well done etc. I often times see myself telling my children…”Why must I have to do a,b and c while you get to play.” In truth, they need me to play with them, not clean the bathroom 🙂 I am eager to read more on the subject and I will dedicate myself to me more Mary!

  • natasha says:

    I’m very much like Martha. My husband works odd hours so it’s usually up to me to work, pick up the kids, cook, clean, homework, etc. All the usual parent stuff by myself. I find it so hard to just appreciate the time I have with my boys let alone find time to sit and listen to God and do the things I really NEED to be doing.

    • Jenn says:

      Natasha: I can relate. But I think that is why we both joined this group and chose this book to read and talk about. Good luck in making time!

  • I am so grateful that God is changing me to have a heart like Mary´s. Yes it is a struggle for me to let go and let God, but I want to sit at His feet more and more and let the struggles in life go. I am still like Martha where I want to get things done and often,, much to my shame I do nto always make time for my Saviour. In the perfect world I would take tiem to spend time with Jesus to sit at His feet and let Him minister to me and to hear His voice instead of all the chatter of the world. I know this study will show me how to let go and let God use me in His time and not my own.

  • Cindy says:

    I want to be more aware of Satan’s tactics of distraction, discouragement, and doubt. How true: “Get people’s eyes off God and on their circumstances. Make them believe that their ‘happiness’ lies in the ‘happenings’ around them… Satan knows that if we’re overly worried and bogged down by duties, chances are good our hearts will not hear the Savior’s call to come…” I want to be satisfied only by God and I want to hear His voice when He speaks. I want that Living Room Intimacy!

  • Miranda says:

    I was a Martha, performance conscience & self sacrificing. I wanted everyone to be full, satisfied, safe, and happy. Yet, I was always forgetting to take care of myself, my personal responsibility, and sometimes my own spiritual growth as well. I could have nailed a sign over my door that read, “When I relax I feel guilty.” But over the years I’ve become more of a Mary. Prayer has helped me calm down. I have to stop everything to be able to pray and listen to our Heavenly Father’s reply. I’m still working on sitting quietly at Jesus feet. I have to keep reminding myself, “Be still and know He is GOD,” but I will keep trying. I guess you can call me ‘MaryMartha.’ The two are slowing becoming one.
    If I were a perfect woman I would..care much less of what worries me and enjoy life more. I would know how to trust GOD completely.
    My favorite moments were thinking about why Martha was so compelled to run the show her way. I felt like a therapist, sister, co-conspirator, and it made me look deeper at myself and my own “controlling” issues. Writing out the scripture references were helpful reminders of GOD’s love for his children and that He is the author & finisher of our faith.

  • Stasia Nielsen says:

    I will have to go for the final question. We are missionaries to Mexico and at the present we are stuck in Texas while we await the funds we need to renew our working visas and papers for our vehicle. The only internet we can get here is at the local McDonald’s. I had just finished reading chapter two when we drove up to the MickyD’s on Sunday afternoon. As soon as we walked in the door, the children ran for the play area and my husband to plug in his comp. It was a good half of an hour before I could even open my comp as I ordered snacks, took the children to the toilets one by one, and handled one of Ella’s many breakdowns. (Ella is Autistic – PDD-NOS)

    I finally sat down and opened up my comp and no sooner than I turned it on did my dear hubbie ask for a refill. I hadn’t even ordered for myself, I wanted all the time I could to catch up on my work and emails. So up I got, making my way for the beverage station, as anger smoke seemed to seethe out my ears… I was rumbling something to myself about how I had to do all the work, when BAM, God brought me right back to what I had just read. Yes, as moms we have certain responsibilities that we just are unable to shirk, but there are many things distractions, that we take on just for the sole purpose of being distracted. I immediately thanked God for my sweet family and asked Him to multiply what little time I did have, which He graciously always does. I re read that chapter again and I am sure it will not be the last time. There are too many things we cannot shirk as moms, but there are many things we can…. so that we can sit at His feet and receive what we need to give to others.. I love what my own grown up daughter said to me not long ago, “Mom, you can’t pour liquid out of an empty glass.” SO true huh?? We need to have Him fill us up first, so we can give to others from the overflow of what He gives us.

    So good… soo wonderful

    • Rachel Kingston says:

      Stasia – Thank you so much for sharing. I will be praying for you specifically. I know what it is like being in a 3rd world country. My parents are missionaries in Ghana West Africa. God is so good, and will give you the strength. I too, will one day be a missionary, and not just supporting my husband in the ministry, but taking care of my family. I will pray that the Lord guides, directs, and encourages you! Please let me know if there are specific prayer requests. God Bless!

    • Tiffany says:

      Stasia, I can only begin to imagine what you’re talking about. I’m also a support-raising missionary, but I’m a single. I personally have found that support raising and that waiting process makes everything more stressful and in some ways challenges the Martha side of us even more because it seems like there are less tangible goals each day. I will be praying for you and the lessons that God wants to teach us both in preparation.

  • Christy says:

    It may sound odd, but my favorite moment in reading the study and other women’s posts was being convicted of my selfishness. I am realizing that my Martha tendencies are my escape to selfishness- masked by the “need to make things perfect for others” lie. The people in my life don’t care how clean my house is, how fancy dinner is, or how much I can pack into a day. They want my time and attention just like Jesus does and it has been my front of perfection that I’ve used to get out of what is hard for me- vulnerable, worthwile interaction- loving other people above my own needs and desires at the moment. I am excited now to keep reading, and to see how this study changes me and my relationship with God, and ultimately my relationships with others…..

  • Simplesoul says:

    My response to the discussion questions is a combination of the questions. Yes, I find that I am another Martha! One of my most often stated quotes is “my time is not my own.” I feel that I have no control over the hours in my day as I scurry between the needs of my husband, children and pets. I used to work – 30 years – but due to health concerns, I had to stop, so I no longer have that “distraction” but in many ways, I managed my time better when I worked than I do now. Instead of becoming more Mary like, I suddenly found myself deeply entrenched in a “Martha” mentality! My insight for the week was a profound one. I was beginning to wonder if I made the right decision in signing up for this study. Every time I sat down to read my chapters, either the phone would ring, I would hear that “Mom” that couldn’t be ignored, I would look at the clock and see that it was time to fix dinner – in other words, distraction, distraction, distraction!! However, I made it through and in these first precious pages I found exactly what was going on here – Satan was wanting me to feel discouraged and defeated before I even got started! This lesson of the week showed me that I need this study more than I ever knew – I can’t wait to see what is in store in the coming weeks.

    Before I close, I would also like to comment on the sharing that is going on here. This is my first online Bible study and honestly, i wasn’t sure how it was going to work. I got my answer today as I have thoroughly enjoyed reading each comment that has been posted! I have found myself wanting to comment on so many of your posts! Please know that whereas I haven’t said anything to each of you, I have read your comments and appreciate your time in posting them!

    Have a blessed day, my new friends! I look forward to the fellowship that comes from this study. This “Martha” is truly trying to become more like “Mary” in every way!

  • Carol says:

    1. I use to be Martha all the way! Always planning and making sure that everything was perfect. But after some time learning God’s Word I’m much better but still not where I need to be.
    2. If I were a perfect woman … I would be able to do learn the first time what I am taught!
    4. I’ve known the Lord for a long time but still haven’t found that peace and fullfillment I am longing for.

    Over the past few months I have been in that place of asking God – “Is this all there is?” I’ve tried it all, singing in the choir, helping with Bible Study, leading a Bible Study, serving at church and yet I continue to wonder “is this it?”. After reading the first chapter of this book I knew the reason for it falling into my lap like it did. God is answering my question – there is more!

  • Erica says:

    I am more of a Martha, I love serving. But I often use busyness as an excuse to avoid. I don’t think I stumbled upon this bible study by accident. I was looking for a women’s bible study because I have been caught up in the busy work and not learning from Jesus.
    One thought that has stuck out to me is most often the things we think HAVE to get done are put on our to do list ourselves. Jesus told Martha that she didn’t need to be busy, that she should be sitting along with Mary. I am working to find that balance. The kids don’t care if I make a 5 start dessert every night and have all the dishes done. Sometimes I should get out of the kitchen and sit on the floor to play with them and listen.

    • Angie says:

      I don’t think you stumbled upon this study by accident either Erica! God is so good to lead us to places where he can teach us. Thank you for leading Erica to this study, Father; we praise you and love you!

  • Angie says:

    1. Which woman do you relate to most, Martha or Mary? Why?
    I definitely relate more to Martha. I am a doer and allow the work that I think needs to be done distract me from what is the better thing.

    2. Finish this sentence: If I were a perfect woman, I would …… get it all right, all the time.

    3. Have you seen a “holy makeover” in your own life or the life of someone you know? What happened?
    I have seen God’s work of transformation in my own life. I am such a different person than I was prior to Fall 2008. I know it is a holy makeover because it comes about through no effort of my own; all of a sudden I will realize that I am different; that I think or see things differently than I used to.

    4. Share a favorite moment from this week’s study.
    “Deep inside of you there is a hunger, a calling, to know and love God. To truly know Jesus Christ and the fellowship of the Spirit. You’re not after more head knowledge—it’s heart-to-heart intimacy you long for.” (Page 2)
    This is EXACTLY where I’m at; I could not have put it into better words. Father, help me to learn how to find that intimacy with you.

    • Rachel Kingston says:

      Thank you Angie for sharing that…I will definitely be praying for you and praying the same thing for me! Thanks for sharing! 🙂

  • Rachel Kingston says:

    1. I, like many other women on this blog, am a Martha yearning to be more like Mary. I am one, that cannot sit while there are things to do. Especially right now, I am 8 weeks from my due date, and all I want to do is help others and be busy doing the Ministry. I am very active in my church, and it is hard for me to sit still and let other’s have an opportunity to be a blessing and be blessed. When there is a ministry that needs someone’s attention, i tend to be the one to jump into it and take it on, becuase noone else will. Well, that is taking away a blessing for someone else. I yearn to be like Mary and desire the “sincere milk of the Word”…but as said above…I do get very distracted.
    2. If I were a perfect woman, I would ……rely fully on God to let everything happen when it is supposed to happen. I do know i need him now more than ever!
    3. Yes, it has been in my husband’s life. Prior to us getting married, he lived his life the way he wanted to, not serving God, not going to church. The Lord grabbed a hold of his life, and I have seen a drastic change in the past 3 years. We have been married for only one, but in this past year, he has done the following:
    * Finished a 2 years of Bible school in a year in and a half. (training to be a Pastor/Missionary)
    * Became the Sunday School Superintendent at our church
    * Is a deacon in Training
    * Is now preaching every Sunday Evening at our Church
    * Is drawing closer to our Lord.
    This has been such a blessing to me! Praise the Lord, that HE can grab a hold of anyone’s life, even if they have strayed and were backslidden.
    4. I have to say, my favorite moment this week, was just reading through the books, realizing that it’s not about us. I praise the Lord for the examples in his Word. From Mary/Martha, Elijah, and the Disciples…God is teaching me every day that I need to trust Him completely. He knows what is best, and is wanting us to just step out in FAITH daily! Drawing closer to Him helps us realize that nothing happens in our lives that God does not already know and is carrying us through it! Trust Him!

    • Christine says:

      Wow…that’s a Holy Makeover! Thanks for sharing this Rachel.

      • Rachel Kingston says:

        1. This would be my Husband! Prior to when we started dating 3 years ago, he lived his life the way he wanted to. He didn’t go to church and did not desire the things of God. God truly got a hold of his life, and was slowly drawing him back to church. As he came back (I was single at the time and desiring to be a missionary), we started talking as friends. I began encouraging him to draw closer to the Lord. As I was seeing, that I was desiring to be with Tom more than being a missionary….the Lord got a hold of my heart during our Missions conference. During this time while I was saying – “Ok Lord, I will let go of my relationship with Tom and continue my desire to be a missionary.” ; Tom was also being drawn by the Lord. He was surrendering to full-time Christian Service (as a missionary), as I was preparing to break up with him. God is so good. Well, since then, he has done the following:
        • Completed 2 years of Bible School in 1.5 years.
        • Serves as a deacon in training at our church and also the Sunday School Superintendent.
        • Started a Visitation program to promote the programs in our church in our community
        • Preaches every Sunday Night
        I cannot thank God enough for what a transformation he has done in my husband’s life. He has drawn us closer to the Lord through all of this. Of course, we have our ups and downs, but that is Satan trying to deter us from following the Lord.
        2. I think my favorite moments in this study this week were just the different individuals that have gone through the “valley’s” in their relationship with the Lord. I think of Elijah, Mary/Martha, and the disciples and how they doubted the Lord…yet, the Lord encouraged them to trust Him and draw closer to Him. I really don’t know how many times I have said “Lord, don’t you care”…I don’t know how many times I’ve been distracted, discouraged, and doubted…but the Lord has brought me through them and closer to Him. I encourage all you ladies, to search for the song “Valley of Vision” by Sovereign Grace…the words are so powerful, and yet so appropriate! He leads us through those valley’s in our relationship with Him.

    • Jace says:

      “God is teaching me every day that I need to trust Him completely.”

      So true, Rachel!

  • Jenn Hardacre says:

    1) I am definitely a Martha. I am the one who has to have my lists and my calendar with everything that I need to get done mapped out for each day. I find that with all my kid’s activities, the house, the animals, my husband, going back to school full-time and all of my volunteer work, that there are just not enough hours in the day to get everything done. I have recently decided that I need to start taking care of myself, both mentally, physically and spiritually. That is one of the reasons that I decided to join this group. I have started letting the house not be as perfect and realizing that spending time with my family is more important than the floor being done everyday. I really want to start being more like Mary and carving out time in my day where I can just sit and listen to God.

    2) If I were a perfect woman, I would ……be able to readily put everything in God’s hands and let him lead me where he feels best.

    4) My favorite momemt from this weeks study was reading Ezekiel 36:26-27. I am going to try to do what it says…..as long as you put yourself in him hands he will give you the changes you need!

    • Jace says:

      Jenn…I LOVED Ezekiel 36:26-27…so much so that I wrote it out on a note card and refer to it often throughout the day. Thank you for reminding me of that!

  • Christine says:

    If I were a perfect woman I would…not need Jesus. Thankful I’m imperfect and need my Savior!!!

  • Tiffany says:

    I’m definitely a Martha as well. I like DOING and in fact, I’m good at DOING. This week God has convicted me both through this book and another one how much that puts attention on me. At one point I thought, “How would my day change if I woke up asking ‘what’s God going to do today?’ rather than ‘what do I need to do today?’. I’m going through a period of transition in my life right now and it’s really hard for me to not have a lot to do. To sit and wait on God is uncomfortable and I’m easily discouraged and led to doubt. I have to keep reminding myself what a precious Mary time this can be for me.

    The other thing that has stood out to me this week is from our verse. It says, “learn from me.” As a teacher, I recognize that that means I don’t have to do it perfectly right now. Learning is a process. I’m not failing because I’m discouraged or not trusting, I just need to keep learning!

    • Christine says:

      “To sit and wait on God is uncomfortable’ is so true Tiffany!

      Be still before the LORD
      and wait patiently for him; Psalm 37:7 NIV

    • Patti says:

      Tiffany…what other book are you reading? I, like you, feel the need to always be doing, and I never really thought of it as a selfish act. In fact, I’ve always thought of how unselfish I am because I am always doing for other people!! What an incredible insight you had!!! I think I will go to bed with a prayer of thanksgiving tonight and wake up asking “What’s God going to do today?’ rather than ‘What do I need to do today?’

      THANK YOU!

  • Lori says:

    I am definitely a Martha, who yearns to be more like Mary. I, like many women, feel the need to have a spotless house and delicious dinner on the table, while being impeccably dressed after coming home from working 8 hours a day. News flash, it’s not going to happen! I love taking care of my husband and children, but I do find myself often feeling resentful if my husband doesn’t help as much as I think he should.

  • Patti says:

    Oh, I am definitely a Martha and unfortunately my family knows it so I end up doing more than I should. I loved the part that said “I need to know” we tell ourselves. “No” God answers softly, “you need to trust.” and then “But He loved her too much to give her what she wanted. Instead, Jesus gave her what she needed”. How often do we think we know what’s best and if we just stopped to TRUST and LISTEN we would find out differently. This is so hard for me to do…but I am working on it! I am starting to pray every day: I want you, Jesus, to be the center of my life” I think if HE is center, we will be more likely to trust and listen.

  • karen says:

    I am definitely Martha. In fact, before starting on this study, I was annoyed with Mary thinking her to be irresponsible in light of the work involved with making guests feel comfortable. I have to say, I would have been very frustrated. I tend to see the whole picture of things that need to be done, or ways to make my guests comfortable in my home- but that need to be perfect spills into every aspect making times of rest during a busy day “challenging”.
    If I were a perfect woman , I could do what i needed to do, and notice and take advantage of the “rest periods” during the day.
    I am seeing God working in my life to be the center of my day- while it is hectic and demands my attention, or when it is time to rest in him during the busy day. It is going to be a process with this type A woman!!!
    I was convicted by the 3 d’s. I am excited that God is using this study to bring things to light that He wants to confront and correct.

  • Ashley says:

    1. I relate more to Mary but I feel guilty not being more of a Martha. Sometimes this world makes me feel that if I am not rushing around, busy, lacking sleep – that I am somehow failing or not living up to my potential. My heart is a Mary heart. I just feel the pressure to be a Martha.
    2. If I were a perfect woman I would live in joy and peace!
    4. My favorite moment from this week’s study was in the study questions when we are asked to read Mark 4:35-41. This is one of my favorite stories of the Bible and Mark’s is my favorite telling of it. The line that speaks to me is Jesus saying “Do you STILL have no faith?” Still? After all that I am and after you have left your lives to be with me, you still don’t trust me? It reminds me that doubt is real and normal and can take over even the best of us .. but that God is bigger than doubt every single time.

    • Heather says:

      Ashley, your point about having a Mary heart but feeling pressure to be more of a Martha really stood out to me. I am a Martha, but long to have more of a Mary heart. I am worried about what others would think of me if I suddenly pulled back from all of the things I do. What if I didn’t take on so much, stopped trying to do it all and act like I’m a superwoman. Would I be seen as becoming lazy, unmotivated, etc…? I long to be more like you and share your Mary heart.

  • Gina says:

    Martha, Martha, Martha! I’m constantly aiming for perfection – even in my spiritual walk. I have check lists that must be completed. Even my quiet time has become part of my daily to do list. But I’m finally seeing that these “goals” are putting all of the attention on ME! Lord, thank You for opening my eyes and showing me the better way. Help me to shift my focus back to You.

  • Megan says:

    1. I find myself so much more of a Martha but with a yearning to be Mary. I really want the help and sound just like Martha half the time (or more than half!). I ask for help and demand help only when I get completely overwhelmed. Until I reach that boil-over point, I just suck it up and mutter to myself. My husband has been opening my eyes to the need for me to ask for help and not get resentful and angry. Between this study and my husband, God is stirring some interesting questions in my heart! I can’t wait to see what kind of Holy Makeover happens because of it.

    • Christine says:

      I think Martha has a “spirit of resentment” inside her heart and Jesus wanted to expose it so He could heal it. Many of us carry this same weight. We overextend ourselves or pressure ourselves towards perfection, and then when things don’t go as perfectly as planned, resentments overflow. I’ve had many spoiled holidays because I did just this!

      • Angie says:

        I know that “spirit of resentment” and have embarrassed myself on more than one occasion due to it. Thanks for sharing this, Christine. I believe you are spot on with your assessment!

  • Cindy H says:

    1. This is a really good question. I think that I identify more with Mary than Martha. Several years ago, I published a book of stories. I put myself in the place of Mary. Here is Mary’s story: http://cindy-aquietplace.blogspot.com/p/mary-and-martha.html
    Mary catches my imagination because she is so eager to really “know” Jesus. She is not afraid to step out of her traditional role and sit at Jesus’ feet.
    2. If I were a perfect woman, I would ……follow through with more of my “good intentions”.
    4. The author wrote that Jesus didn’t really try to make Mary into Martha or Martha into Mary……he wanted them both to find “the best part” of themselves in Him.

  • Wendy says:

    I am not a perfectionist, but I definitely have Martha’s need to do it all. I kept everything up for a long time and then eventaully just crashed into a sobbing heap. Which is what led me to online bible study – hoping to find balance.

  • Judee Baysinger says:

    I am more of a Mary, my sister is the Martha. I love to study and learn and be involved with the group. It’s not that I don’t what to help, I just don’t want to miss anything important. I do help, but being in the thick of things is more my style. I also think Mary was a little shy, which I really am too. I have seen GOD do many miraculous things in my life and the lives of others. I once prayed to have my finances improved to help others, I’m getting a sizable inheritance from a first cousin I didn’t even know was rich. GOD has done other things in my life as well. I had to completely start over at the age of 56 and that was not in my life plan at all. GOD knows our needs and takes care of us. Believe that with all your heart, mind and soul. It’s true.

    • Christy says:

      Love your post!

    • Jace says:

      Judee, I love that you are a Mary. I’ve honestly never met one…never!! It will be fun to travel on this journey with you to see your perspective on things. Thank you for sharing! I’m looking forward to walking with you. 🙂

    • Sue Alice says:

      I am the MARTHA and she is the MARY in our world. She is also the big sister, and was a GREAT TEACHER of special needs kids for a long time. She is a Mary, she would be sitting beside Christ while I was cooking. Ha-Ha. I am glad she is my sister.

  • Kerri says:

    I definitely relate more to Martha. I often feel overwhelmed with the sheer amount of things that need to get done on a daily basis. It’s hard for me to imagine just setting everything aside for some God time, unless I can manage to get up at 4:30 in the morning to squeeze it in before the day begins. I would like to make more time for bible study, quiet contemplation, and prayer and make it as much (or more) a priority in my life as all of the other things that I always find time to attend to. It resonated with me that busyness breeds distraction that that Satan will use that busyness for his purposes. I think this study will help to put things in perspective and allow me to focus more on what is truly important.

  • denise says:

    1. I’m more like Martha. I make sure everything gets done. I also feel like I’m put in the Martha position. Its just my husband and I and a 5 and 6 yr old. My husband homeschools the kids and is an expert of I’ll do it in a minute and in a minute doesn’t get done. So when I get home from work I’ve got a days worth of mess plus school work and cooking to do. I’ve been praying about this alot over the past 6 months and I think God is making some changes so its easier for me to handle everything.
    2. …I would be able to do everything (everytime).
    3. God’s working on me. I still have a long ways to go. I wouldn’t call it a “holy makeover.” I would like to see more contrast between the before and after pictures!
    4. My favorite moment was when we were taking apart Matthew 11:28-30. A phrase that really spoke to me was “Take my yoke upon you…” That is an action on our part. We have to be willing to take that step to learn. I think all too often I refuse the yoke or will do it in a minute or give whatever excuse and my unwillingness impairs my learning. I want to be more willing to take the yoke, to not be afraid of it, to trust that the yoke is easy and the burden is light.

    • Megan says:

      I love your comment about “taking up the yoke” being an action on our part. I never looked at it that way but you are right. We have to make that decision to give it to Him and let Him take care of our largest burdens with us. I tend to lose sight of that until I hit that rock bottom spot where I just don’t know what else to do by myself and then it’s “oh yeah, God wants to help” I think you put it really eloquently and maybe it will help me to remember that.

    • Christy says:

      I can relate to alot of what you’re saying- alot of my prayers are for my husband to have a better memory when it comes to things he said he’d take care of. But I know I should be praying in another way- he is a great dad and husband- any other insight you have had into this would really help me!
      I also saw the Matthew verse as full of action-oriented references. That’s why I put it off alot too, although giving it all to God and taking on His priorities would be less work than trying to balance my own priorities!

    • Jace says:

      That is so true, Denise! There are countless instances of God saying, “If you ______, then I ______.” “If you, then I.” He gives us the freedom to make the first move! If we move, He moves. If we take the step or make the choice to take on His yoke, He is faithful to do His part.

    • Lauri says:

      Denise, I don’t want to “overstep” (it’s easier to say things to a stranger isn’t it?) but since your husband is homeschooling could he just go another step and be a “house husband” since you are not at home? It seems like it take a LOT off of you. Or is this totally out of the question? 🙂

  • Maureen says:

    1. I relate to Martha because of busyness (just not in the ktichen) but my personality is more quiet and stay to the side like Mary BUT that of course doesn’t mean my heart is open to worship like Mary’s. I find I get easily discouraged. I often have a great time in the quiet morning with the Lord, but then a few hours later, life has hit me hard and I feel discouraged. Afterwards I feel like an idiot for the way I felt because it is usually a bunch of little things that set off my discouragement. . I liked the suggestion in the book to set a kitchen timer, let me feel that way for a few minutes and then move on. I think it’ll be helpful that I can now label what I feel (discouraged) and know it is a tactic to get my mind off worshiping my God.

    • Tiffany says:

      I can totally relate. In fact, I find it easier to remember the times where I’ve felt let down by God rather than the times that He has done amazing things. One things that has helped me is to start everyday listing the moments of joy I’ve had in the last 24 hours and 5 things I’m thankful for. Like you said, it doesn’t always last, but it does help me to quickly go back to what God has done recently.

      • Miranda says:

        I agree. Every bit helps. Listing our joys is a good idea. I try to stay as far away from
        D-iscouragement as possible. Starting my day with thanking GOD and listening to praise music helps me redirect my thoughts in the right direction. It’s a constant practice or ill wind up back where I started if I let it.

      • Cathie says:

        Wonderful idea.

    • Amy says:

      2. If I were a perfect woman, I would ALWAYS have the right order of priorities: God first in all that I do. I would ALWAYS turn things over to Him when I got overwhelmed and distracted. I would turn to him even when things in life are going well. I would ALWAYS turn over my problems and not be worried, anxious, or stressed. I would stay cool, calm and collected when my kids and husband “push my buttons.” That is the perfect superwoman!

      • Donna says:

        I could not have said it better Amy – I agree completely. I would add that I would have time to do it all, always. The Proverbs 31 woman seems so out of reach!

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