Lies Women Believe Online Bible Study Week 10

Welcome back to womens online bible study as we finish Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. I did not want to write this today because I’ve been so blessed by the study and the women in my small group… I don’t want it to end! We’ve examined 40 lies women believe and we looked at numerous scripture Truths to counter the lies. Week by week Nancy has challenged us to look for the lies we’ve been living by. Her summary in chapters ten and eleven really pull this study together!

During the bible study we saw how the enemy sets traps and tangles us with his lies. We also gained freedom from bondage by studying scripture. The two major points of our study were:

  1. Believing lies places us in bondage
  2. The truth has the power to set us free

Our bondage begins when we accept the lie and allow the enemy to rule over our thoughts. Our freedom is claimed when we stand firm in scripture.

When Jesus spoke in scripture he spoke of the truth.  He even equipped us with the Spirit of Truth!

  • Yet because I tell the truth, you do not believe me! John 8:45 NIV
  • Can any of you prove me guilty of sin? If I am telling the truth, why don’t you believe me? John 8:46 NIV
  • But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. John 16:13 NIV
  • He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created. James 1:18 NIV

Jesus came to teach because so many were misled by religious leaders and rituals, they did not recognize the Truth when they saw Him.  “Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” John 14:6 NIV

To know the truth we need to know Jesus. To know Jesus, we need to read scripture. If you’re using the Companion Guide then you had the experience of writing out the truths and corresponding scripture verses. Putting the words on paper, in my own handwriting, was a moving experience for me. As I wrote across the page I imagined the same words written into my heart. It was quite powerful! I then identified the truths I needed to claim most and printed them on a card with the related scripture verse. I’ll meditate and memorize them so I’m more resistant to deception.

Speak truth into your hearts. Stay in relationship with Jesus.

If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples.  Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. John 8:31-32 NIV

Prayer Requests

Our Prayer Wall is the place to reach out with your prayer needs and praise reports. Please visit the page and pray for those people who are asking for you to lift them up in prayer.

For Next Week

  • Pray for the women who are still completing this study
  • Check in with your Small Group Leader
  • Sign up for the next study

Group Discussion- Answer ONE question or as many as you like

  1. Look at the 40 lies in the table of contents for the book Lies Women Believe. During the course of this study, which lies have deceived you most? How have these lies kept you in bondage?
  2. What truths do you need to claim today?
  3. If you were to write a scripture verse from this study and carry it with you, which verse would you select?
  4. Would you recommend this bible study to a friend? Why or why not?

Have a great week…share what you have learned with others as you walk in Truth!

God is good…always!

Lies Women Believe Online Bible Study Week 9

Welcome back to the Womens bible study as we discuss Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh DeMoss, week nine. Some of you have sent emails letting me know you’ve already finished the study. Others started late and are reading  behind the group, while many just finished reading chapter nine. Next week is our last week of study and then we’ll have a three week break for everyone to finish their current study. Be sure to order your books for the next bible study so they arrive by April 30th.

Our lesson this week examined lies we believe about our circumstances. The lesson was perfectly timed (as always) when I found myself encouraging my teenager daughter over her circumstances. In tears she cried “God hates me! He lets bad things happen to me and I just know He just hates me!” Sometimes as adults we can sound just like a teenage girl! We look up and instead of seeing a Father who loves us, our vision is clouded by our circumstances and we can’t see Truth. This is one reason why bible study and reading scripture is so very important.

Nancy Leigh DeMoss exposed these lies during week nine:

  1. If my circumstances were different, I would be different
  2. I shouldn’t have to suffer
  3. My circumstances will never change, this will go on forever
  4. I just can’t take it anymore
  5. It’s all about me

Once you have crawled out of this victim mentality, it’s easier to see its ugly head when it appears in others. The victim blames life on circumstances while the victor seeks Jesus. The victim stays in a comfort zone of depression, while the victor seeks healing. The victim lives in darkness, while the victor lives in the Light. True identity theft is when Satan keeps you in bondage to victim mentality. He convinces you that you’re a victim of circumstances. Nancy warns us “if we fail to see the hand of God behind our circumstances, we will be vulnerable to confusion, frustration, bitterness, anger and despair.”

Victims believe they are powerless and therefore do not seek the blood-stained hands of Jesus. They turn away from forgiveness, mercy, grace and love. They hide in their misery of their comfort zones.

As I explained to my teenager daughter, we will suffer on this side of eternity. Christian lives are filled with hope, not perfection. To be Christ-like and follow Him does not mean you will not suffer. Sometimes we suffer from our own actions, sometimes we suffer from the actions of others, and sometimes we suffer for unknown reasons. Yet in our suffering we find a magnificent God and an indescribable joy. You cannot find it if you do not seek Him.

Be faithful, even to the point of death, and I will give you life as your victor’s crown. Revelation 2:10 NIV

You my dear daughter…are an Heiress.

Truth is….it’s all about God and His will. Live in obedience, in suffering and in joy.

Be blessed by your relationship with the King no matter your circumstance.

Circumstance: a condition, detail, part, or attribute, with respect to time, place, manner,agent, etc., that accompanies, determines, or modifies a fact or event; a modifying or influencing factor: Source dictionary.com

Your circumstance is a condition and it changes over time, just as you went from being a teenager to an adult. May you persevere and walk by faith, not by sight. 2 Cor 5:7 NKJV

Prayer Requests

Our Prayer Wall is the place to reach out with your prayer needs and praise reports. Please visit the page and pray for those people who are asking for you to lift them up in prayer.

For Next Week

  • Pray for the women who are doing this study with you.
  • Read Chapter Ten and Eleven in your book and companion guide.
  • Look at the list of Key Resources on page 269 for topics addressed in this book
  • Check in with your Small Group Leader
  • Sign up for the next study

Group Discussion- Answer ONE question or as many as you like

  1. What circumstance do you blame for your lack of joy?
  2. Why is suffering inescapable as a human?
  3. What fruit has suffering produced in your life?
  4. Share your thoughts about this week’s lesson.

Have a great week…share what you are learning with others as you grow in truth!

God is good…always!

Lies Womens Believe Online Bible Study Week 8

Welcome back to the Womens Bible Cafe! We’re almost finished with  Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh DeMoss as we  discuss week eight. Our lesson this week focused on emotions and truth in scripture.  Nancy writes “I know of no other tool the enemy uses more effectively to lead us as women into bondage than our emotions.” This past week we examined our  emotions against scripture and God’s promises. We learned that too often and too quick we believe and act on these emotions.

One example is how we react to the emotion of anger. If we sat in a room together and I asked how many of you regretted making a decision in anger, more than half of you would raise your hands. The feeling of anger can cause us to have affairs, gossip, use hurtful words, break something, seek revenge…and much more. Sometimes we justify our anger by our physical situation- illness, menstruation, menopause, exhaustion or ailments. Other times we justify our anger with verbal defenses so strong, the best attorney couldn’t disagree with us. For this reason scripture warns us to be on guard for anger and watch our words carefully. Satan can use your anger to hurt or injure another person and cause you shame for your actions.

Anxiety is another emotion we act upon. We’ve looked at several scripture verses reminding us to keep peace and be calm. When anxiety overpowers us, Satan uses it to worsen our situation and draw us apart from God. We attempt to control the situation and prevent further trouble, yet in doing so we often dig deeper holes.

The best and obvious solution for controlling our emotions is scripture and prayer. When we are in the presence of God, our emotions are easier to manage. We’ll recognize them and act upon God’s will, not our feelings at the time.

As I finished reading  this chapter I realize that some emotions stem from chemical imbalances and require medical attention. Mood disorders, depressions, addictions and such are best managed with professional help. Once the brain chemicals are in balance it becomes easier to filter your thoughts and control them. You should not feel guilty for taking antidepressants or mood stabilizers if your doctor has diagnosed a need for them. Too often men and women use mood altering behaviors- such as alcohol, recreational drugs, smoking, or promiscuity- to deaden their emotions and anxiety. Long-term use of this behavior has devastating effects on the person and creates an even larger problem then the one they were self-medicating!

If you haven’t done so already, take a moment and reflect on your emotions. Examine your past week and look for symptoms of emotions that need to be addressed. Then make a personal decision and commitment on how you will handle this in the upcoming week.

Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Phil 4:7-8 NLT

Suggested Reading

Battlefield of the Mind: Winning the Battle in Your Mind
By Joyce Meyer

So Long, Insecurity: You’ve Been a Bad Friend to Us
by Beth Moore

Who Switched Off My Brain? Revised: Controlling Toxic Thoughts and Emotions
by Dr. Caroline Leaf

Prayer Requests

Our Prayer Wall is the place to reach out with your prayer needs and praise reports. Please visit the page and pray for those people who are asking for you to lift them up in prayer.

For Next Week

  • Pray for the women who are doing this study with you.
  • Read Chapter Nine in your book and companion guide.
  • Look at the list of Key Resources on page 269 for topics addressed in this book
  • Check in with your Small Group Leader
  • Sign up for the next study

Group Discussion- Answer ONE question or as many as you like

  1. Why is it important for us to realize that God expresses emotions?
  2. How much do your emotions affect your actions on any given day?
  3. What advice would you give to women who are struggling with anger, shame or fear?
  4. Share your thoughts about this week’s lesson.

Have a great week…share what you are learning with others as you grow in truth!

God is good…always!

Lies Women Believe Week 7

Welcome back to online womens bible study as we discuss week seven of Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh DeMoss.  We’re looking at some controversial topics in this bible study and this week we examined biblical truths about having children.  Some of you may have skipped over this chapter because you do not have children. I encourage you to go back and read this chapter for three reasons:

  1. God may place you in a position to minister to someone who has children or is planning on having children
  2. God may place children in your life who need mentoring, such as nieces and nephews, or children of coworkers and friends
  3. God may place you in a ministry role where you are working with children

There is no good reason for you to miss reading this chapter! Please remember as Nancy teaches on these controversial issues, she is reflecting her understanding of scripture. You are not required to agree with her, however it would benefit you to search scripture and find your own answers for anything you disagree with.

This week we looked at five lies:

  1. The lie that children are a burden (and disposable through abortion)
  2. The lie that children need exposure to culture
  3. The lie that children must go through a rebellious stage
  4. The lie that children are believers because of actions at an early age
  5. The lie that parents are/ or are not responsible for their kids actions

The world views children as disposable burdens even before they are conceived or born. Abortion is an effective tool of Satan to convince women their babies are worthless, just a mass of tiny cells. Our society tolerates sexual promiscuity and if you’re irresponsible with your actions, then throw away your baby.  About 1.2 million babies are aborted each year in the United States alone. Many women trust an abortion doctor before they trust God to help them raise the child or plan for adoption, and then live with the shame of their actions. Update: We will be leading an abortion recovery bible study soon…we’re evaluating the books now and creating a safe and secure location for the discussions.

Another lie is exposing children to acceptable norms of culture. Last month I took my children to the Barnes and Noble bookstore and we walked past a large section of books titled “Paranormal Teen Romance.” I remarked to my children that vampire stories where the boy is alone in the bedroom with a teen girl, physically abuses her, and then marries her and has a vampire baby is NOT healthy entertainment. It’s a culture trend with American teens and worries me greatly! A recent search on Amazon revealed 787 books for paranormal teen romance and 163 books for Christian teen romance. Look what Satan is doing to our future…yikes!

Were you amazed when Nancy said it’s a lie to expect rebellion from our children? I can recall a few bible stories about rebellious children, yet Nancy wants us to see the good in our teen children and not anticipate or tolerate the worst in them. As Christian parents it’s imperative that we monitor our children’s activities and maintain open communication with them. By spending time in their activities we’re able to influence them in some of the decisions they make. Many times we discover our children are trying to help their secular friends solve a problem and we need to be the voice of knowledge for them. We mentor our children into adulthood through our own behaviors and words. It’s wrong to assume that our children are believers, as they must discover Christ in their own hearts and develop a relationship with Him. Create a habit of praying for your children. If you’re unsure how or what to pray get a copy of the book The Power of a Praying® Parent or The Power of Praying® for Your Adult Childrenby Stormie Ormartian. You may also like reading Prodigals and Those Who Love Them: Words of Encouragement for Those Who Wait by Ruth Bell Graham.

Finally, Nancy discusses the lie that we’re not responsible or overly responsible for our children. Often I remind myself that my daughters belong to God, and not to me. I’m their caretaker and a spiritual leader as I teach them to live according to scripture and to love Jesus. Ultimately they are responsible for their own actions. I pray constantly that their hearts and minds are centered on God.  I saw Carol Kent speak about her personal experience and then read her book When I Lay My Isaac Down: Unshakable Faith in Unthinkable Circumstances as she discusses keeping her faith after her son murdered a man. This book is powerful!

Prayer Requests

Our Prayer Wall is the place to reach out with your prayer needs and praise reports. Please visit the page and pray for those people who are asking for you to lift them up in prayer.

For Next Week

  • Pray for the women who are doing this study with you.
  • Read Chapter Eight in your book and companion guide.
  • Look at the list of Key Resources on page 269 for topics addressed in this book
  • Check in with your Small Group Leader

Group Discussion- Answer ONE question or as many as you like

  1. How is the world’s view of children different than God’s view?
  2. If you have children, share why they are a blessing to you.
  3. What did you like or dislike about chapter seven?
  4. Share your thoughts about this week’s lesson.

Have a great week…share what you are learning with others as you grow in truth!

God is good…always!

Lies Women Believe Week 6

Wow…this woman’s online bible study continues to amaze me!  We just finished reading week six of Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh DeMoss.  Last week as we discussed week five on God’s priorities for women, the conversation heated up here at the Womens Bible Cafe. Some of you agreed with the author, while others felt angry and uncomfortable with her. Others sent me private emails and I was deeply touched by your comments. Most evident from last week’s discussion is that Nancy Leigh DeMoss has us stepping outside our comfort zones. We examined our priorities and see if they’re in alignment with scripture. This week the lesson continues as we discuss lies we’ve believed about marriage.

We now realize that marriage “was designed by God to reflect His glory and His redemptive purposes” as Nancy writes in chapter six. This is not an invitation to choose the meanest, smelliest, most offensive man you can find….marry him…and then say…Lord, show me the glory! The point of this week’s lesson is to encourage those who struggle and wonder why their marriages are not overflowing with joyfulness. “Happiness is not found in any relationship. True joy can only be found through Christ,” says Nancy. If we depend on our husband for joy  then we’re likely to place him on a throne and pressure him to continue serving us.  He’ll quickly become an idol. We are reminded in scripture not to place anything above God as an idol, including our husbands. God meets all our needs, not our husbands.

We also learned to allow God to change our husband’s heart and stop trying to “fix” our men. In the book Surviving a Spiritual Mismatch in Marriage by Lee and Leslie Strobel,  Lee writes “Yes, I was an atheist, but she refused to let that term define me. Instead she tried to see me as God saw me: as a treasured part of his creation, a human being whose soul was etched with the likeness of God, a wayward son whom he longed to connect with.” His wife led her atheist husband to Christ by modeling her faith and introducing him to her best friend… Jesus. Her love for Christ influenced his heart, not her nagging and attempts to repair him. He says “In the end the issue of salvation is strictly between your spouse and God. Be devoted, be prayerful, be encouraging- but don’t try to be responsible. You’re not!”

Finally, we learned about submission from a spiritual perspective. We’re reminded to submit to God’s will and remain obedient to the Father, unless your life is in danger from an abusive husband. I’ve often recommended the book How to Act Right When Your Spouse Acts Wrong by Leslie Vernick because she reminds us to keep our focus on God. “When our spouse acts wrong we can:

  • Choose to LOVE………………..rather than hate
  • Choose to SMILE………………rather than frown
  • Choose to BUILD………………rather than destroy
  • Choose to PERSEVERE………rather than quit
  • Choose to PRAISE…………….rather than gossip
  • Choose to HEAL……………….rather than wound
  • Choose to GIVE………………..rather than grasp
  • Choose to ACT…………………rather than delay
  • Choose to FORGIVE………….rather than curse
  • Choose to PRAY………………rather than despair.”

Leslie writes “God created humankind with free will and we must decide whether we will obey his commands to love both him and others. This power to choose, however is exercised through our will, not our emotions.” If you struggle with the emotions of loving difficult people, then you’ll want to study Loving Well by Beth Moore and discover God’s will for loving others. Submission does not mean a lack of boundaries, so if you’re frustrated by your spouse’s behavior then read James Dobson’s book Love Must Be Tough: New Hope for Marriages in Crisis and learn the tough love principles and when to walk away from for marriage.

My own grandparents modeled perseverance in marriage and when asked why their marriage was so successful Grandpa always said “Each morning when I get out of bed, the first words out of my mouth are ‘I’m sorry.’ I know I’ll do something during the day to offend her, so I start my day with an apology.”

Quotes From Nancy Leigh DeMoss

  • The ultimate purpose of marriage is not to make us happy but to glorify God.
  • Happiness is not found in any relationship. True joy can only be found through Christ.
  • It’s not your responsibility to change your spouse; that’s God’s responsibility.
  • The fact is, marriage is hard and good marriages are even harder.
  • Many women look to men to meet their needs rather than looking to God.

Safety Note

On page 69 of the Companion Guide Nancy writes “If physical danger or abuse is involved, a woman should seek protection, direction, and intervention from the appropriate civil and/or spiritual authorities, rather than attempting to handle the situation on her own.”

Prayer Requests

Our Prayer Wall is the place to reach out with your prayer needs and praise reports. Please visit the page and pray for those people who are asking for you to lift them up in prayer.

For Next Week

  • Pray for the women who are doing this study with you.
  • Read Chapter Seven in your book and companion guide.
  • Look at the list of Key Resources on page 269 for topics addressed in this book
  • Check in with your Small Group Leader

Group Discussion- Answer ONE question or as many as you like

  1. What biblical counsel would you give to a woman who says her husband is not making her happy?
  2. What biblical counsel would you give to a single woman who is not content without a husband?
  3. Share a blessing you’ve experience from submitting,or a consequence from not submitting.
  4. Share your thoughts about this week’s lesson.

Have a great week…share what you are learning with others as you grow in truth!

God is good…always!